World traveler and amicable companion, T.S. Turtle, Esq. will soon be joined by this little fellow. . .

I knitted him from a pattern in the (sadly) long out-of-print Unusual Toys for You to Knit and Enjoy by Jess Hutchison. He is such a friendly thing. I think he’ll do well for himself.

–S.

Lots of people have asked me how they should go about finding a publisher for their own projects, and this is what I usually say. . . (Well, first I should note that I mentioned the self-publishing route a little while back. I meant to go into more detail, but didn’t.) Anyway, if you think you have a good book or two in you and you’d like to be published by a traditional house, here are my two cents.

First, you aren’t really looking for a publisher. What you actually need is an agent who will present your proposal to his or her stable of editors. The best way to find an agent who would fit well with your voice and content is to study books already on the market that are similar to your project in subject, tone, and presentation. Check out the authors’ acknowledgements sections for the names of their respective agents. Then find those agents and contact them directly with your credentials and book proposal.

Writing a good book proposal is its own animal altogether. 78 Reasons Why Your Book May Never Be Published & 14 Reasons Why It Just Might and Think Like Your Editor are said to be good titles worth looking into, for what it’s worth.

 –S.

I’ve come to admire mixed martial arts cage fighting in general and Brazilian jiu-jitsu practitioners like Forrest Griffin and Diego Sanchez in particular. So I jumped at the chance to catch some live MMA action at my area AMVETS hall. I expected to see local fighters in peak condition accurately executing devastating strikes, takedowns, and the occasional rear naked choke, but, save a couple of bouts, most of the fighters looked like this guy. . .

He weighed in at 316 pounds and pretty much laid on his opponent the whole time. Complete with sloppy, looping blows and easily-winded combatants, many of the other fights could’ve just as easily taken place at TondaBeth’s Hideaway Lounge. A spectacle for all the wrong reasons.

–S.

Ah, happy, inexorable decay! This morning my toilet broke, but by early afternoon, I had that bastard schooled. Thanks goes to the handy Dare to Repair: A Do-It-Herself Guide to Fixing (Almost) Anything in the Home.

I tip my hat to authors Julie Sussman and Stephanie Glakas-Tenet — and to the grizzled man at Kleindorfer’s who sold me a replacement Fluidmaster 400A fill valve seal for $1.39. I am especially pleased that the problem was not with my septic tank. . .

–S.

Things have been quiet here — save the clicking and clacking of my knitting needles. This fabulous turtle (complete with removable sweater shell!) comes courtesy of knitty.com.

Soon he’ll be taking a very long swim — about 6,000 miles, in fact — to live with a presently turtle-less little girl. Godspeed, T.S. Turtle, Esq.

–S.

So the last week has been interesting…

After The New York Times ran my op/ed I was contacted by ABC to do a quick segment on Bee Movie and real-life honeybees. You should be able to see it here — just click on the video link labeled “Queen Bee Sounds Off.”

Just yesterday the Times ran a great piece that really explores the failings of Bee Movie in the way that I would’ve liked to had I had more space to do so. At least the info is out there now.

–S.

In today’s New York Times, I take Bee Movie behind the woodshed for a light spanking. Someone had to do it…

–S.

Ever wonder what you would get if you crossed a Lost Soul Companion Project poofy bird with an ordinary honeybee? Wonder no more. . .

(Drawn by James and published with his kind permission.) Isn’t she cute?. . .

–S.

Speaking of tedium, I just finished a new bottle cap mirror, which is on exhibit with several other artists’ works created with found/recycled materials. (Yes, it is for sale. Yours for $400. Woo hoo!)

Thanks go to all of the heavy drinkers who contributed. I hope you’ll keep on drinkin’ — and saving me your bottle caps. I’m especially looking for very colorful or unusual ones and bottle caps from outside the U.S. since there are so many amazing specimens out there.

–S.

I wanted to show this off sooner, but I thought it best to wait until now. In the latest issue of CRAFT Magazine (Volume 05), you’ll find my how-to write-up of the Cave Canem — “Beware of dog” — paper mosaic (modeled after the ones in ancient Pompeii) which I completed on my living room floor.

The whole thing spans 80 square feet, and here is a little close-up of the tedium in progress…

Don’t get me wrong. The dogs and I are quite pleased with the result. It’s just that, well, getting it all done was kind of a bitch.

–S.